Tynor and Mallory
Weddings are more than a ceremony or even the beginning of a new part of a couple’s life. It’s a way for a couple to express themselves to family and friends through parts of the whole event. In that way, the weekend was a perfect expression of Tynor and Mallory.
Tynor and Mallory met a couple of years ago, and it didn’t take them long to click. I first met her when she, Tynor, and I had dinner at a BBQ place that Tynor and I enjoy. I’m not sure who was the most nervous, since an argument could be made for any of the three of us, but we quickly fell into a rhythm and had a great time.
Kellen and Noël met Mallory sooner than Tynor had intended. Kellen and Noël were meeting Tynor at the airport to fly down for my mom’s funeral, and it so happened that Mallory was also flying out that day. Tynor didn’t expect the other two to show up so early, so it was an impromptu introduction.
Once she was introduced to all of us, Mallory dove in with both feet and quickly became part of the family. She got a rapid introduction to the normal rhythm of our year, with holidays, birthdays, meeting with family when they visit Seattle, and other traditions that we have. Add to that Stacia’s side of the family and their traditions.
Tynor got an introduction to Mallory’s family on a trip to North Carolina. They seemed just as charmed by Tynor as we were with Mallory, and her brothers especially seemed drawn to him. He unexpectedly spent Christmas with them one year because his flight kept getting canceled due to the weather, and everyone made the best of the situation.
Not long after they started dating, we began to hear about the couple taking dancing lessons. Their teacher, Andrea, became a role model for them, and they kept going back, gaining more confidence in their abilities. Dance became such a large part of their lives that they integrated it into their wedding celebration.
Pre-wedding picnic
The day before the wedding was a picnic for immediate family. The wedding was going to be at McMenamins Anderson School in Bothell, so many people were spending the night there. We chose to have the picnic at Blyth Park, which isn’t very far away; both Tynor and Kellen had been there many times as kids, so there was a nostalgic angle to the venue, too.
While we had met Mallory’s dad and mom before, it was great to meet the rest of her family. The couple had rented lawn games which were pretty popular. Mallory’s dad also sang, with his wife Marty singing backup vocals. Later on, Mallory sang along with him.
Tynor’s grandparents, Stan and Marian, had brought their dogs and they were also a hit, especially with Mallory’s brothers.
Unfortunately, Kellen fell ill a couple of days earlier, so he and Noél weren’t able to join us. Our cousin Lindsay and family from Texas also weren’t able to make it, since she and her son hadn’t been feeling well the week before.
The urge to avoid running out of food is always great, and I had ordered plenty more than we needed. Fortunately, people took quite a bit home, and we were able to fit everything else in the refrigerator and freezer.
The Wedding
One of the tasks I had for the wedding was to fold the 1,000 cranes for Tynor and Mallory. I had finished folding and stringing them pretty early in the year but I had originally planned on hanging the strings from a parasol. Unfortunately, that didn’t work out, so I ended up making a few torii (Japanese gate) structures. After we showed up at McMenamins, I set those up, and hung a 1,001st crane from a bunch that my dad had folded. Cranes were also part of the centerpieces and decorated the cake.
After a quick lunch, people changed clothes and we headed outside for photos. There were many combinations of people, but it went pretty quickly.
📷 from 🎬 by Niall Snapp
Once the photos were done, we went back and waited for the ceremony to begin. People had started to arrive, many of whom I hadn’t seen in many years. Just before the ceremony, I FaceTimed with Kellen, Noël, Lindsay, and her husband Joe, and walked around with the phone so people could say hi. Having made the rounds, I put the phone on a tripod and we took our seats. Mallory’s dad Kevin walked her up the aisle, and once the bride and groom were standing at the altar, Mallory’s mom Barbara made sure the dress was nicely draped on the floor.
The ceremony itself was rather simple. One thing I found interesting is the officiant chose to read something by Robert Fulghum, who wrote All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten. Tynor’s mom and grandfather knew him, and he has deep connections with the Unitarian Church (I believe he was somehow involved with the one not far from our house).
After the ceremony, some appetizers were served, and then Andrea (Tynor and Mallory’s dance teacher) gave a quick rhumba lesson to anyone who wanted to learn, and many people participated. Once people got the hang of the rhumba, Tynor and Mallory had their first dance, then Mallory danced with her dad. After that, everyone was welcome to join in.
The band finished that set, and it was time for dinner, giving people a chance to chat. After dinner came the toasts. Mallory’s brother Colin and her dad gave toasts, and Tynor’s mom Stacia also said a few words. After that, I said a few words and gave the banzai toast (at the bottom of this page).
After the toasts was more dancing, starting with Tynor dancing with Stacia. Everyone else joined in as the band played another set. People then went back inside for the cake cutting, then back out for the band’s final set.
As the band was winding down, people started saying their goodbyes. The whole event was magical, and everyone seemed to have a great time, most of all Tynor and Mallory. The wedding was indeed an expression of themselves; lots of dancing, yet at the same time a very laid-back event. Lots of opportunities for family and friends to interact and make new connections. They put a lot of work into planning the wedding, and it showed.
Final Thoughts
A couple of years between first date and wedding seems relatively quick, and Tynor and Mallory’s relationship also progressed quickly. After the initial getting-to-know-you period came sharing one’s interests with the other. Tynor shared plenty of his favorite Seattle haunts with Mallory, and she got to share her favorite Raleigh, NC places with him. They then started to find common interests and create new ones, such as dancing.
Where are they now? There is an ease about how they do things together that shows they are comfortable being themselves as they are going about their day. That ease extends to family; Mallory seems so relaxed around all of us that you wouldn’t think we’ve only known her for a couple of years. And while Tynor has spent less time with Mallory’s family because of distance, he seems just as natural around them as they do around him.
I mentioned in my toast that Mallory being a member of the family may be official now, but it’s actually been true for quite a while. She can make anyone feel like the most important person in the room and has an infectious laugh that makes me smile no matter how far away I am. A perfect match for Tynor’s caring, fun-loving nature. What more could a parent ask for?
Remarks and Banzai Toast
Mallory, you know,
our whole family is glad
you’re a part of it.
You blended in fast,
so effortlessly, we all
knew you were the one.
You’ve heard the stories
about Tynor, more than once,
but still laugh each time.
You’re officially
family now, but that’s been
true for a long time.
Tynor, each parent
wants their child to find someone
to make them happy.
I am so pleased that,
around Mallory, you can
truly be yourself.
You have a quick laugh
and can make anyone feel
glad to talk with you.
With our shared interests
we can, and have, talked ‘til three.
Some parenting, huh?
I couldn’t be more
proud of both of you today.
Now, the banzai toast.
Shinro shimpu, banzai! Banzai! Banzai!
Raihin shokun, banzai! Banzai! Banzai!
